Somewhere between Faith & Fear

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So it’s 4 am here on the west coast and it’s been another breathless night. The struggle is real ya’ll. As I sat here struggling to try and catch a breath I began go to write in my journal. As I wrote I discovered that I am somewhere between faith and fear. It’s a really terrible place to be in and although it’s just a moment I’d thought I would share.

Well let me begin with I was doing one of my services for a friend. It wasn’t really going very good and I just wanted to quit. I’m glad it was one of my friends and she said keep going but it was still frustrating. I simply don’t have all the tools I need. I got through it but it was painful. As soon as I was done though a stream of crazy ran through my head.

Why? Why did I do this? Why did I even put this out here? Why did I waste so much money? I should just stop, yeah I’m goin’ stop! I moved on with the day but it’s been bothering me. I have these moments where I am in love with what I’m doing and it’s amazing to step out push forward in the things I know God’s called me to. On the other hand I have moments where I hate these stupid decisions I spent so much money to start this and when I’m not selling my services or items making my money back. I just feel stupid!

I say all this to say it’s never easy and not always fun. I make mistakes and everything is certainly not perfect. I am fighting so hard to remain on the side of faith and not slip into fear.  And so I live to struggle another day, you know fight for my right to create. Stay up my loves!

Xo,

Lizzy P.

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One thought on “Somewhere between Faith & Fear

  1. Everyone struggles with wanting to quit at times.
    But you must not give up on God and yourself for every success there are hundreds of failures . Don’t let a mistake take you out we all make mistakes. Ask God what you can learn from a set back and get back to it. Remember in the service industry you can’t please everyone no matter what you do some people are not going to be happy, do your best, forgive and move on don’t dwell on it. Head up praise God in the mist of the struggle.

    Like

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